41 replies to this topic

[harvey45]

That is my attempt to translate a joke I read in portuguese. Enjoy

So there were two functions walking together, f(x)= C and g(x)= e^x. They saw a differential operator and f ran away, because she didn't want to become 0, but g stayed and said "you can't do anything against me, I'm e^x". And the differential operator replied "well, looks like you're wrong, because I'm d/dy".

Other than that, it's pretty well translated.

Q: Why are quantum physicists so poor at sex?

Spoiler for A:

Because when they find the position, they can't find the momentum, and when they have the momentum, they can't find the position.

A student riding in a train looks up and sees Einstein sitting next to him. Excited he asks, "Excuse me, professor. Does Boston stop at this train?"

Edited by harvey45, 16 April 2011 - 11:42 PM.

[ghettologician]

Chemists do it on the table... Periodically

Edited by ghettologician, 01 July 2011 - 10:19 PM.

[1+1=3]

I don't get these.

[Thalia]

I don't get these.

Which ones?

[TheCube]

For rookie1ja: Obscure Jokes

In the Other Sections in Jokes.

[Nemanzin]

Albert Einstein, Blaise Pascal, and Isaac Newton were playing hide-and-seek. Einstein counted to twenty and Pascal ran off, but Newton just drew a square in the ground around himself with a stick. Einstein turned around, saw Newton, and said, "I've found you!" Newton looked confused. "No," he said, "You've found one Newton per square meter. You've found Pascal!"

[TheCube]

Albert Einstein, Blaise Pascal, and Isaac Newton were playing hide-and-seek. Einstein counted to twenty and Pascal ran off, but Newton just drew a square in the ground around himself with a stick. Einstein turned around, saw Newton, and said, "I've found you!" Newton looked confused. "No," he said, "You've found one Newton per square meter. You've found Pascal!"

lol

[DudleyDude]

What do you get when you cross an elephant with at grape?
A: wine

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a mosquito?
A: |Elephant| |Mosquito| Sin(a)

What do you get when you cross a mountain climber with a mosquito?
A: Trick question; you can't cross a scaler with a vector.

[Yoruichi-san]

A mathematician goes home with a hot chick he picked up at a bar (no, that's not the joke ). As they are undressing each other, the chick stops and frowns at his "equipment".

"Is there something wrong?" The mathematician asks.

"It's just so...normal." The girl replies.

The mathematician blinks. "Is there something wrong?"

[Rob_Gandy]

NaCl
------
NaOH

The base is under assault!