Obscure Jokes

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The definition of "obscure" varies, but my definition is that if it presupposes specialized, or otherwise "uncommon knowledge", it'll work. If that doesn't apply, but you can make a case for it's being obscure or have told it and confused people, then tell it anyway.

I'll start it off with three of my tested favorites...

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Interrupting coefficient of friction.

Interrupting coefficien--

Mu!!

So, Rene Descartes is in a bar near closing time. The bartender asks him, "Would you like another drink?" Descartes replies, "I think not" and vanishes. After Descartes disappears, the bartender turns to Heisenberg. "Wow, did you see that?" the bartender asks, to which Heisenberg replies, "Possibly, but I can't be sure."

Why do Marxists only drink herbal tea?

Because proper tea is theft.

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ummmm, can you explain those, please?

well, i use "obscure jokes" every time i talk about my friends and what crazy things we did that day... :lol:

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Hydrogen atom walks into a bar and says to the barman:

"Have you seen an electron? I've lost mine"

Barman:"You sure?"

H.A.: "I'm positive"

Yeah..sorry 'bout that.

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Posted · Report post

ummmm, can you explain those, please?

well, i use "obscure jokes" every time i talk about my friends and what crazy things we did that day... :lol:

  1. the coefficient of friction is represented by the greek letter Mu or m.
  2. "I think, therefore I am."-Rene Descartes, Heisenberg's Uncertainty principle.
  3. I don't know much about Marxism or socialism but I think it's a play on property (or proper tea).
Does that help?

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yeah, thanks!

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for (int i=1; i<=100; i++) {

System.out.println("I will not talk during class");

}

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lol nice ones......JAVA joke.....I actually did that once......:lol::D

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My brother told me this one.

In the physics department toilet someone has spray painted a large graffiti on the wall, it reads "Werner Heisenberg may have been here"

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This is possibly the obscurest joke I know: Penguins unite!

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Werner Heisenberg, Kurt Gödel, and Noam Chomsky walk into a bar. Heisenberg turns to the other two and says, "Clearly this is a joke, but how can we figure out if it's funny or not?" Gödel replies, "We can't know that because we're inside the joke." Chomsky says, "Of course it's funny. You're just telling it wrong."

Curiosity may or may not have killed Schrödinger's cat.

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This is possibly the obscurest joke I know: Penguins unite!

I feel like I should get this :(

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I feel like I should get this :(

I believe it's a reference to Linux/Unix but I'm not sure.

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...so when the neutron finished his meal at the restaurant, he was surprised to learn it was free. "are you sure" he asked the waiter. "Trust me," the waiter said. "theres no charge."

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I do get that one :D

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hehehe.... I'm gonna use that one at school today!

Not everyone will get it, but confusing people never fazed me before!

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I believe it's a reference to Linux/Unix but I'm not sure.

Oh, this really is a reference to something? Haha, I didn't know that! This is just a joke between me and my friends.

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Oh, this really is a reference to something? Haha, I didn't know that! This is just a joke between me and my friends.

Oh, I thought it was because Linux has a penguin for a logo and Unix kinda sounds like it's related to union and stuff... my mistake.

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Not my joke but... what do we do when chemists die?

We barium.

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Q: How can you tell if an engineer is an introvert or an extrovert?

A: If s/he is an extrovert, they look at YOUR shoes when they talk to you.

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That is my attempt to translate a joke I read in portuguese. Enjoy ^_^

So there were two function walking together, f(x)= C and g(x)= ex. They saw a derivative and f ran away, because she didn't want to become 0, but g stayed and said "you can't do anything against me, I'm ex". And the derivative replied "well, looks like you're wrong, because I'm d/dy".

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That is my attempt to translate a joke I read in portuguese. Enjoy ^_^

So there were two functions walking together, f(x)= C and g(x)= ex. They saw a differential operator and f ran away, because she didn't want to become 0, but g stayed and said "you can't do anything against me, I'm ex". And the differential operator replied "well, looks like you're wrong, because I'm d/dy".

Other than that, it's pretty well translated. :)

Q: Why are quantum physicists so poor at sex?

Because when they find the position, they can't find the momentum, and when they have the momentum, they can't find the position.

A student riding in a train looks up and sees Einstein sitting next to him. Excited he asks, "Excuse me, professor. Does Boston stop at this train?"

Edited by harvey45
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Chemists do it on the table... Periodically

Edited by ghettologician
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I don't get these.

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I don't get these.

Which ones?

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For rookie1ja: Obscure Jokes

In the Other Sections in Jokes.

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