kestrelknight

*bump* *whistles a merry tune*

Oh, good grief. I think I'll just spectate until I have something useful to contribute...

Aw, man. I was too late... You guys solved it so darn fast.

Well, can you then explain to me how God was created? He wasn't. He was always there.

Well, I had to choose one person to be 'it'. It;s difficult to take it personally when I've never actually met you, so... No offense meant.

I'm going to take that as a hand! Okay, so onto the joke. So Kikacat123, Aaryan and DeathStone0000 are all mysteriously murdered at exactly the same moment. They meet up at the Pearly Gates, and are talking among themselves, when they are greeted by St. Peter. "Hello guys," he says. "Look, there's been a bit of an accident - some idiot wishing for a million ducks or whatever, and now Heaven has ducks everywhere. Unfortunately, we can't just get rid of them - orders from the big guy upstairs, you know - so you'll just have to avoid stepping on them for now. Apologies, and, well, welcome to Heaven!" He steps aside, allowing them through the now open gates, and their eyes widen in shock. There are ducks literally everywhere. "Well, I guess we'll just have to do what he says and avoid them," says DeathStone0000, and his companions agree. They're trying to get to a nearby McDonald's (they really are everywhere), when Kikacat123 steps on a duck. St. Peter appears out of nowhere, and says, "I'm sorry, but we can't just let these things slide. There has to be a consequence." He chains Kikacat123 to a hideously ugly man for the rest of her eternity. The man leads her away to a hipster cafe, and she pauses to give a small wave to her friends, before going inside. They wave back, now too scared to even go near a duck. Months pass before one of the remaining two steps on a duck - this time DeathStone0000. He's chained to a hideously ugly woman for the rest of his eternity, who leads him to a nightclub nearby. DeathStone0000 stand for a moment in the doorway, waving goodbye to Aaryan. Ten years later, Aaryan - having seen the fates of his friends - still hasn't stepped on a single duck. He's greeted by St. Peter. "Congratulations," he says, shaking Aaryan's hand, "You haven't steeped on a duck. You deserve a reward." St. Peter chains him to a beautiful blonde girl for the rest of his eternity. "Wow," says Aaryan, "I had no idea there would be a reward. You're really very beautiful, and I don't know what I did to deserve a girl like you." The girl sighs and says sullenly, "I don't know what you did, but I stepped on a duck." - The End -

If he knows enough to know how to create the beginnings of life, I'm sure he's close enough.

Oh, trust me, I was born ready.

Oh, don't worry. I can be a baws at word puzzles (sometimes), but I absolutely suck at math/code based puzzles. Logic I can do pretty well. But hey, if the best puzzle-solvers will die first, I'll last for ages...

A kid can't do that forever. Trust me. I've watched one try. This God we're talking about is omniscient, he doesn't need to build the train set, because he knows exactly what's going to happen. He can recreate it all in his head without having to affect the actual world. If that's the only reason he's created, why should he bother?

I think she means cisra.com.au. I looked at a few of the archived puzzles there a few months ago, but *disclaimer* never looked at one called Joe Nobody.

Okay, if this joke falls short, then my apologies in advance. One more volunteer.

Yay! Thank you! Now, One or two more people. Then you are rewarded with your joke.

Why would the creator stay "out there" doing "God stuff"? We have a need to be social, maybe He does too. I doubt that's fulfilled by screwing around with aware, flying elephants.

Why, thank you. It's good to be back.

*applause*

Wow. I didn't know. I am also a Christian and a Creationist, but my faith tends to be kinda messy, and thinking about it and trying to put it into words tends to make it worse. That's why I won't be posting my own beliefs, but perhaps some comments on those of other people.

Also to all the puns. I see. I didn't really get it either, but I do now. My response: to the puns.

1.Kikacat123 2. 3. MikeD 4. Marksmanjay 5. kestrelknight 6. 7. 8. TheChad08 9. 10. Aaryan 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. Brainy Back-ups (if needed) 1. Flamebirde 2. 3. Moi aussi. Just hope I won't forget...

You Know Sometimes Just Random Words Will Do The Trick Or At Least Get You Started.

Oh no! We're straying into meta territory! But in Soviet Russia, meta territory strays into you!

In Soviet Russia, Russian reversal reverses you!

Put vanilla pudding (or a really pale custard) in an empty mayonnaise jar and eat it around them. Eat something really crunchy (a whole lettuce, crackers, raw carrot, etc.) as loudly as possible right next to them while they're trying to study, watch TV, or whatever else.