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Things you learn from tv/movies


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- If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises wearing

their most revealing underwear.

- If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St. Patrick’s Day parade...at any time of the year.

- All grocery shopping bags contain at least one loaf of French bread.

- The ventilation system of any building is a perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building without difficulty.

- Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do.

- A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a pretty nurse cleans his wounds.

- When paying for a taxi, never look at your money. Just pull out a bill or two and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare.

- If a killer is lurking in your house, it’s easy to find him. Just relax and run a bath even if it’s the middle of the afternoon.

- All single women have a cat.

- Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.

- It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a martial arts fight. Your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one.

- When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your room will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.

- Dogs always know who’s bad and will naturally bark at them.

- No matter how badly a spaceship is attacked, its internal gravity system is never damaged.

- If there is a deranged killer on the loose, this will coincide with a thunderstorm that has brought down all the power and phone lines in the vicinity.

- All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they’re going to go off.

- It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.

- If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps and join in with you.

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instead If you end up putting a girl in danger, you will endup making out with her just a half hour later. If someone shoots you in the torso, and you fall of a skyscraper into the freezing sea

:lol: ,those are so funny! Luv this one: "If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps and join in with you."

-When disarming a bomb, it can only be disarmed at the last second, no matter what you do

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-Bad guys have a tendency to explain their whole evil plan in detail, then leave, allowing the hero to escape

<(^-^)>

Luv when that happens! I'm always *bangs head against desk* everytime a baddie does that...and they call themselves evil geniuses? :P

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Luvinit!

- If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises wearing

their most revealing underwear.I made some strange noises just to see how Mrs LIS reacted :) .

You can see the Eiffel tower from every window in Paris! :lol:
And a canal by every house in Amsterdam or Venice :P
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- When talking on the phone, you are required to repeat everything the person on the other line says:

Ex:

Mr. G: *picks up phone* Hello?

Mrs. L: "Help, I've been attacked by a muderer!"

Mr. G: You've been attacked by a murderer?

Mrs. L: You have to come right away!

Mr. G: I'll be over there right away!

Mrs. L: And don't tell anyone where you're going

Mr. G: Don't worry, I won't tell anyone where I'm going

:P

<(^-^)>

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- When talking on the phone, you are required to repeat everything the person on the other line says:

Ex:

Mr. G: *picks up phone* Hello?

Mrs. L: "Help, I've been attacked by a muderer!"

Mr. G: You've been attacked by a murderer?

Mrs. L: You have to come right away!

Mr. G: I'll be over there right away!

Mrs. L: And don't tell anyone where you're going

Mr. G: Don't worry, I won't tell anyone where I'm going

:P

<(^-^)>

You used Mr. G? :lol: Reminds me of Arjun's french project where mrg was the hero...good times -_-

Luv your mini convo!!!!!

-When kidnapping, always gag your victim and tie them to a chair. Also, make sure they have some way of escaping or communicating to the outside world (ie. leaving victim with his/her cellphone)

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-Aformentioned sensitive guy will, undoubtedly, break aformentioned scantily-clad female's heart.

Agreed...too...many...chick flics :rolleyes:

-If you tell someone not to do something, and then some scary music comes on, you know they'll be dying within the next half hour :P

<(^-^)>

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Agreed...too...many...chick flics :rolleyes:

-If you tell someone not to do something, and then some scary music comes on, you know they'll be dying within the next half hour :P

<(^-^)>

:lol:

-when the telephone rings and you're home alone, you know you are in danger (especially when it ends up being someone trying to sell portable furniture... :o :o :o )

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-when in a car chase you must never shoot their tires. this will cause the car chase to end.

-when stealing a car, even though you automatically know how to hot-wire it, always check the visor and the keys will fall onto your lap.

-if you see something extraordinary, everyone who doesn't believe you will wind up getting killed by it.

-if someone says something that seems out of place, they will wait until their death scene to clarify it.

-pairing odd couples always makes for the best outcome

-whenever it seems all hope is lost and the bad guy will win, someone has surely recorded one of their devious conversations and will broadcast it to everyone via loudspeaker with perfect timing :lol:

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-if a detective has undergone 1,000 cases, but will retire within the week, this last criminal will surely kill him

-but don't worry, because the inexperienced rookie detective will bring the villain down...

-by removing a girl's glasses and letting her hair down she instantly becomes the most popular girl at school

(disclaimer: I think it's hot when girls wear glasses, but that's beside the point :blush: )

-the only way for a mildly bad person to redeem themselves is to die for the good guys, usually unnecessarily

-if you're sure that a meeting with a known felon will take place, it's a setup

-main characters can only be hit by bullets from other main characters

-the one time a trusted person who is often devious decides to do the right thing, he will not be trusted

-if Mulder thinks it's true, Sculley will not B))

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- if ever in a gun fight by yourself. Don't worry. No matter how many people are shooting at you (especially those with fully automatics) you will not get fatally wounded by any bullet (maybe just grazed) and each shot you fire will always hit the enemy in a kill zone.

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- No matter where you are...If you are being chased by a deranged killer, your cell phone will never be able to pick up a signal (This is true for a single person or a group...Even with different service providers).

Edited by Prince_Marth85
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