Y-san's Last Dance

[Yoruichi-san]

September 29, 2009

After graduating from Redrum University (with dishonors for having blown up the chemistry lab in her search for Enigmaticium...twice), Y-san turned her focus to taking down IETNAT, the illusive and dastardly covert criminal organization.

Working together with the ever vigilant Police Chief Leroy and her protegee and rival from Ecidius University, B-kun, the team had managed to collapse most of the infrastructure of the group, leaving the remaining fragments to scramble and hide to avoid capture by the respective authorities.

Now, Y-san was taking a well-deserved break at the gorgeous beach house on loan to her by B-kun's very wealthy parents. As she reclined in inexorably comfortable chair, sipping a chocolatini, appreciating the view out of the sunset from the entirely-made-out-of-glass side of the house that was suspended over the ocean, she heard a sound from her laptop alerting her that a new file had been added to her Dropbox.

It was a stepfile for the game Stepmania, and had been put into her "Creative" folder. It must be from B-kun, she thought. He was the only one with access to that folder that played the game. Curiosity and laziness waged a brief battle within her, but finally her inner cat won out and she reluctantly pulled herself out of the far too comfortable chair and started the game.

[steps]

After a verse, she frowned. The steps did not quite go with the music and didn't span the entire length of the song. More over, the steps were awkward, which was completely unlike the graceful and proud B-kun.

Seeing him online on gchat, she messaged him. "Hey, what's up with these steps?"

B: "Huh? What steps?"

Y: "The steps in the file you just put in my Dropbox."

B: "I haven't put any files in your Dropbox recently."

Y-san frowned. Then who could have put it there? Had someone hacked in? To put a stepfile in her box?

She went to the fridge and grabbed a bottle of diet green tea, which sat next to the catch of the day presented to her as a gift from a local fisherman whose fishing schedule she had helped to optimize and make 90% more efficient, then returned to her chair and studied the notes again, carefully, grabbing a pen and paper and scrawling some ideas, and finally, realization dawned on her. She leapt out of the chair this time and snatched up the keys to her car. She rushed to the door, swung it open, and...

"And where may you be going?" asked the man standing in the doorway. The man in the expensive-looking suit, with the expensive-looking watch, and an expensive looking haircut. The man holding the expensive-looking gun pointed at her.

Y-san shrugged. "I just realized the sea air doesn't quite agree with me, after all."

"Well, that's unfortunate, but don't worry, I'll see that you don't have to endure it too much longer." The man replied. "But for now, I'm afraid I have to ask you to step back inside." He gestured with the barrel.

"You're Harold Mortimer." It was a statement, not a question. "The kingpin of IENTNAT."

"I prefer 'CEO'. 'Kingpin' sounds so...criminal. Those as clever and audacious as us deserve to own the world , I only organize them to take it."

"Well, apparently not clever and audacious enough," Y-san couldn't resist quipping.

Mortimer conceded a nod, then waved the gun dismissively. "We'll rebuild. As long as key players of ours are still in the game, we can always win. And after you're gone, there will be no more distractions for my godson."

"Godson? You mean Trick?" Last she heard, Patrick "Trick" Moriarty had escaped from prison for the third time, after she had helped put him there for the third time.

Harold Mortimer nodded. "Yes, he's a very bright boy, so much potential, for his weakness is that he seems to have some inexplicable fondness for you."

"Well, if it makes you feel any better, the sentiment is not reciprocated," Y-san muttered.

The kingpin smiled smugly. "I'll tell him you said that when I relay to him the news of your demise."

Y-san let out a resigned sigh. "Well, if I'm going to die, care to have one last drink with me?" She stepped towards the kitchen.

Mortimer shrugged. "Why not. But don't try any sneaky stuff."

A lopsided smile crossed Y-san's face. "Me, sneaky?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The police arrived on the scene forty minutes later. The neighbors had reported hearing a gunshot, followed by a loud CRASH, and had called 911. Police Chief Leroy had heard the report and shot to the scene faster than he would have thought his 2004 Toyota could have gone.

The door had been locked when he got there, and he had had to break it down to enter. The scene confirmed his worst fears. There was overturned furniture, broken glass from what looked to have been a tumbler or two, and a pool of glistening blood on the marble tile floor. There was a trail of blood splatter leading to the side of the house facing the ocean, and the glass had been shattered outward as if something...or someone...had gone through it.

Gulping his last bit of hope, Leroy stepped to the opening and looked down. Having somewhat of a case of vertigo, he immediately drew back after glancing the shear drop to the ocean below.

A bead of sweat trickled down his brow and he looked around for something to wipe it. On the marble kitchen counter, he saw a napkin, which he moved towards. As he neared, he saw there was something hastily scrawled there in a brown substance. It said:

Goodbye, my friends. It's been fun. Remember the Autumn of 267.

The Police Chief let out an immense sigh. She just had to be enigmatic, to her last breath, didn't she? His weary eyes gazed upon the final rays of the setting sun disappearing over the infinite ocean horizon. That woman.

Why did Y-san rush to leave?

What did her message mean?

...To be revealed when 1 and 2 are solved ;P

[Yoruichi-san]

@Y-san

half eaten bear claw? bottle of grey goose?

Are you going to maintain your Chinese heritage/persona now that you have everyone who is not from the US seriously worried about your eating habits?(until they google them of course)

Um...I am Chinese...you can test my DNA...

I also eat mille feulle, shirataki, and gelato, but that doesn't make me French, Japanese, or Italian...

(and it was Police Chief Leroy eating the bear claw, neways...you know cops and donuts...;P)

[phaze]

@Y-San A bear claw is a doughnut??

next you will be telling me that kiwi are not an endangered flightless bird and quite tasty

* mumbles off in the distance about the oxymoron of American English *

[Thalia]

Does anybody know of anything in the refrigerator that would be able to dissolve spaghetti off the leg of a seagull?

The ethanol in the vodka might do it but if you are suggesting what I think you are, that would have to be some pretty strong spaghetti. . . Not sure ethanol is a strong enough solvent though.

[Yoruichi-san]

@Y-San A bear claw is a doughnut??

next you will be telling me that kiwi are not an endangered flightless bird and quite tasty

* mumbles off in the distance about the oxymoron of American English *

Uh...being Chinese, I have a lot of complaints about the English language in general, regardless of pond-side. Such as the lack of a non-gender specific third person pronoun and the dearth of words for the different forms of 'love'...

No chemistry knowledge required to solve this puzzle. Maybe a little physics, but its nothing a normal person hasn't learned by, like, age 5, from observation.

[WitchOfSecrets]

Would a long thread be involved in this? It could be done by looping a length of thread around a seagull's leg, twisting it around a key in the process. As long as the torque was maintained, the loop would stay on until the seagull had reached the jar, and then the string could be untwisted to release the key and retrieve the string.

Edited June 19, 2012 by WitchOfSecrets

[Yoruichi-san]

Would a long thread be involved in this? It could be done by looping a length of thread around a seagull's leg, twisting it around a key in the process. As long as the torque was maintained, the loop would stay on until the seagull had reached the jar, and then the string could be untwisted to release the key and retrieve the string.

Wow...that sounds like something out of Detective Conan (which, trust me, is a good thing )...but no, nothing that precisely tuned/timed.

The dimensions of the jar are somewhat important. This wouldn't work if it were too fat or too shallow.

[phaze]

What size are the meatballs?

If using thread with the seagull,

Before exiting the house tie thread to seagull

release seagull out window

while tieing end of thead to funiture

Go outside and find seagull

Relaese seagul from thead

tie key to thread

go back untie other end from funture

ensure thread is over jar and under door

close door and use key to lock it

pull thread

The only thing I am missing is some way to detach thread from key when it is over the jar

Edited June 19, 2012 by phaze

[Yoruichi-san]

What size are the meatballs?

Hmm...not sure where you're going there...but...um...huge? Y-san is mos def not a vegetarian ;P.

[phaze]

Hmm...not sure where you're going there...but...um...huge? Y-san is mos def not a vegetarian ;P.

At least 4 inches?

[Yoruichi-san]

At least 4 inches?

Umm...not that huge...more like 2-3? I still am curious to see where you were going with this though...

[phaze]

Umm...not that huge...more like 2-3? I still am curious to see where you were going with this though...

Dead end, Just wanted to figure out the size in comparion to the width of the jar,

Had no idea where the abstract notion would take me if I managed to rest a meatball on top of the jar but it would tell me along what lines you were thinking.

The revised thread and seagull manouver

[Yoruichi-san]

Dead end, Just wanted to figure out the size in comparion to the width of the jar,

Had no idea where the abstract notion would take me if I managed to rest a meatball on top of the jar but it would tell me along what lines you were thinking.

The revised thread and seagull manouver

Um...interesting. I'm not sure how you're getting the key inside the jar?

[WitchOfSecrets]

A physics-y solution:

The key was inside the jar before Y-San replaced the jar in the house. Using a slipknot, she made a loop around the mouth of the jar using a double length of string. Then she placed the key in the jar, and swung the jar like a bola ball; if she swung it fast enough, the key wouldn't fall out even when the jar was upside-down. She flung the whole apparatus through the hole in the window like a sling, and when the jar landed, it tended to rest on its low center of gravity. Finally, she tugged the string to release the slipknot.

Or she made a catapult. Either way, the key was in the jar before it got back into the house.

The seagull was a red herring; the crumbs were there because it was a cookie jar.

Edited June 20, 2012 by WitchOfSecrets

[phaze]

@WOS The window was broken outwards not inward, It appears you also have been victim to the spoiler destroyer...

[Yoruichi-san]

Hmmm...interesting...that might work...but the side of the house with the window does overhang the cliff...so it'd be challenging to keep your balance and land the jar and retrieve the string...

The window was broken

when the Godfather fell out it after an epic maneuver involving fish and quick feet (ala playing lots of DDR/ITG/Stepmania)

[phaze]

For thread and no seagull

put key in fish

tie thread to fish

throw fish out window to a safe position where it can be recovered outside

take other end of thread outside through door

retrieve fish and remove thread

tie key to the fish end of the thread using slip knot

lock door with other end of thread running underneath it

pull this end of the thread

the key is dragged through the window

Can anybody figure out a way of positioning it over the jar and some sort of hook to release skip knot from the ingredients mentioned?

It does seem strange that a seagull was mentioned, It seems more likely that the fish was a red herring

[WitchOfSecrets]

I'm starting to think that...

I'm on the right track with the key being inside the jar the whole time. Another option is that Y-san escaped through the window, but not by going down the cliff, but rather, UP onto the roof. If the roof has an overhang, Y-San could have hooked it with a cane, a grapnel, or any number of other methods, pulled herself up, climbed over the house, and left in the other direction.

[Yoruichi-san]

For thread and no seagull

put key in fish

tie thread to fish

throw fish out window to a safe position where it can be recovered outside

take other end of thread outside through door

retrieve fish and remove thread

tie key to the fish end of the thread using slip knot

lock door with other end of thread running underneath it

pull this end of the thread

the key is dragged through the window

Can anybody figure out a way of positioning it over the jar and some sort of hook to release skip knot from the ingredients mentioned?

It does seem strange that a seagull was mentioned, It seems more likely that the fish was a red herring

Love the diagram, btw...clever method...but...

...is not a red herring, but it has no part in the possible escape. It was a plot device to provide a semi-plausible way of possibly getting Y-san out from under the barrel of the gun, so to speak

.

I'm starting to think that...

I'm on the right track with the key being inside the jar the whole time. Another option is that Y-san escaped through the window, but not by going down the cliff, but rather, UP onto the roof. If the roof has an overhang, Y-San could have hooked it with a cane, a grapnel, or any number of other methods, pulled herself up, climbed over the house, and left in the other direction.

Cane? *Indignant glare* What are you implying about my age...

(JK)

But no, no cane, no specialized equipment of any sort. Y-san travels light...

[phaze]

Y-San could have hidden inside before the door was pulverised by the flat foot crime scene wreakers?

Edit: Or outside for that matter of fact (if it is possible to make adhesive out of the ingrediants in the fridge)

Edited June 21, 2012 by phaze