plasmid

You can make someone's head explode if they eat ice cream so fast that they get a really bad brain freeze? Sounds like science experiment time! I volunteer to eat a ton of ice cream

That's it.

That and EDM's answer don't really nail the chilly heart clue. Hugemonkey's ice cream vendor was really close, it just leaves a clue in the last stanza hanging where it talks about an explosion after asking if you're shaking.

Here's an initial shot at it. A parable to take place right after Confucius' parable with the farmer and the thief. I actually thought that Taoist "action through inaction" might come into play on this one, so I gave it to Laozi. It doesn't address all the points that octopuppy brought up, but might be a good starting point to build on. Laozi was awoken in the night as a farmer barged into his dwelling and began looking for valuables to steal. Surprised but not unsettled, Laozi asked the man what he was doing. "I've come to take whatever I wish," was his reply, "for your friend Confucius told me the other day that I was responsible for a thief stealing my crops. If that is they way you Phronists think, then I will steal from you and the fault will be your own for spreading such teachings." Laozi remained calm and asked, "By what reasoning did Confucius say that you were responsible for that theft?" The farmer answered, "He said that I gave the thief no way of supporting himself without stealing, and so I was to blame." Laozi then asked the farmer, "Do you have means of supporting yourself without stealing?" The farmer realized that he did not need to steal and he began to see the fault in his actions, but he replied, "That is beside the point. If the thief was sent by the Essence to punish me for Samarkand's society, then so I am sent by the Essence to punish you for the flaws of Phronism. Now go back to sleep and I will take what I please." To that Laozi answered, "Strike a beast and it will move. Give it a harness and it will move in the direction you wish. It is a wonderful thing to be able to guide so much power and to move without moving at all. Still, any horse would have the sense not to run into a burning fire or jump off a cliff. We all take part in the flow of the Essence. We may attempt to guide it, and it will affect the way that we may act. Just like a horse and rider, so a person and the Essence join forces to make their way through the world. Would you call a horse that jumps off a cliff foolish and deserving of its fate? So too is the person who says that the Essence guided them to act foolishly when they should have known better. "Now in your case, how does the Essence guide you? Tell me which way you would go if you did not struggle against it. Does necessity compel you to steal? Are the laws silent on stealing? Where would you expect to find my foot if you were to steal from me? And what did Confucius say to do with the thief that stole from you the other day?" When the farmer recalled what had happened to the thief, he realized that he was still held accountable for his actions. The farmer did not stay to answer but dropped all we was carrying and fled. Laozi returned to sleep without having to use his foot.

Back by popular demand, enlightenment for the neophyte. With a little bit of a nod to Buddhism's eightfold path by making them non-mutually-exclusive. One day shortly before the council was to convene, Buddha was walking along the top of the narrow Great Stone Quadrangle, a ruin said to be the site of a far more ancient Phronist gathering thousands of years before. He walked a continuous route over the four walls, always going counterclockwise. At each cornerstone he chanted a brief phrase: at the first corner he said "I ponder the passing of this darkness into light and the Essence flows"; at the second "I observe my thoughts objectively and the currents divide"; at the third "I choose the noble course and the flow nourishes me"; and at the fourth "I drink of its waters and awake to a new light"; and so on. A neophyte Phronist came up to Buddha after watching his progress. "Why do you walk forever in such a route?" the neophyte asked. "You get nowhere." "Do you not hear my chant?" Buddha responded. "It is a form of meditation. I walk to celebrate the infinite, circular journey of life, a journey into light, which has no beginning, no end and no destination." "Wasn't it you who advised us to follow our own hearts to find meaning in life and to always enjoy its bounty? You seem to plod this worn and dreary path without purpose. Is there not so much more to life than this?" "This is a great joy," said Buddha. "Everyone celebrates life in a different way. You must respect this facet of nature. You say I am walking without purpose upon these hallowed ruins, but your argument applies to any other action in life as well. The meaning is what we apply to it, there is no pre-ordained or mandated purpose. Each person's journey is his destination." "But why do you enjoy life in this way that seems so tedious?" the neophyte wrinkled his brow into deep furrows. "Do you find it tedious already? You should build more fortitude if you are already exhausted before taking your first step. For me this is an old familiar way to contemplate on past events and better understand the Essence, but for you this is an unexplored path. If you sincerely believe that it will bring ruin then you have good reason to avoid it, otherwise you are depriving yourself of a possible path among many toward the Essence." Buddha then continued his circuit. As Buddha's figure slipped away his words echoed in the neophyte's mind, stirring a new perspective that took shape as the footsteps sounded in the distance. When Buddha completed the circuit, he returned to the neophyte to find that the frown had cleared, and he met eyes filled not with confusion but with purpose. "What is it I have just experienced?" the neophyte asked, awed by the inexplicable power of the sensation. "It is the power of the Essence. You have awakened and are beginning to merge with its flow," Buddha said with a slight grin. "Through its infinite subtlety the Essence offers us a goal, but there are many paths toward that goal and many may be followed by any one person. You may learn the fullness of what that means as you continue your journey and ever refine your direction through this world." Another Phronist soon entered the Quadrangle. She looked around and saw two others walking around the rim of the Quadrangle, chanting at each cornerstone. Curious, she climbed the ancient stone steps and waited until they approached her. "Why do you walk forever in such a route?" she asked. "You get nowhere."

Precisely!

A squadron marching single file We've poison which our foes revile We slither through the leaves In hopes that no one sees Our legion freezes in its tracks But we're not stopping to relax Although we've been surrounded You soon will be astounded For in this casket we won't die Instead we'll soar into the sky To make our getaway With radiant display

Under READ BEFORE POSTING, the new part, step 4, should have {/url} at the end instead of just {url} For both math/logic (http://brainden.com/forum/index.php?act=SR&f=7) and word riddles (http://brainden.com/forum/index.php?act=SR&f=35)

Using the sample under the Important: READ BEFORE POSTING message {url=http://brainden.com/forum/index.php?s=&showtopic=9215&view=findpost&p=178754}this post{/url} ... replace [] for {} just change the text between the first set of [] and the closing

Oilcan gets this one, any type would fit the riddle. Admittedly an easier one so I could test out the new Solved: feature (check out the addition in the Important: READ BEFORE POSTING link at the top of the page) but nonetheless a good job. People can start using the Solved feature on their riddles now - it's basically using the forum's poll feature as a way to flag when a riddle has been solved. There are a few things I would like to point out though. First, be aware that once you set up a poll to show that a riddle has been solved, you won't be able to go back and edit it, so be careful when setting it up. Second, please DO NOT go back and flag all of your old riddles to show that they've been solved, because that would bump them to the front of the index and knock all of the currently active riddles off! Just flag the current and new riddles as they get solved.

Good point about the confusion that would arise from redefining words. The Laozi of the Phronist parable would be upset with me. I renounce my prior heresy and see the light. Getting the redefinitions out of there and adopting a term other than meditation: Humanity struggles to fulfill our potential as it emanates from the Essence, and much remains to be learned and understood. Connecting with the Essence is an endless quest along a path that will be increasingly revealed as humanity parts the veil of the unknown through reason and sober study. While science reveals the mechanics of nature, it remains silent on our overall purpose, and for this we turn to the Essence. Purpose implies a need to act, so old practices which accomplish nothing should be shunned. Do not offer up sacrifices of life or belongings, rather use them to aid your fellow man. Do not pray rote prayers, rather contemplate on your experiences and expose yourself to new ideas to build your understanding of the Essence. Do not pray for intervention from the Essence, rather act to guide its flow. Do not worship by expressing submission, rather express your oneness with the Essence by living joyously and with humble Acts of Legacy. To harmonize with the Essence: Help others, be generous, be reliable. Do not harm others, steal, or lie. Learn throughout your childhood, and fulfill your potential as an adult. Find something you do well that will benefit society and do it. Understand at all times that faith is a supplement to, and not a supplanter of, reason; it is a way to see the world that will lead to fulfillment, and its worth is measured by the degree to which it accomplishes this goal. For the parable of the monk, if we took the route of splitting up the purpose and the free will messages into their own separate parables, how about this for the purpose part? I think Buddha qualifies as the most famous of the meditators at Samarkand with the Bodhi tree story, so he seems like the best candidate to be the monk. I'll also throw in a few words to explain its purpose in establishing his state of mind. (I'm currently undecided on whether a free will vs determinism one should be part of Samarkand or in a Modern Testament so they can talk about Newton.) One day shortly before the council was to convene, Buddha was walking along the top of the narrow Great Stone Quadrangle, a ruin said to be the site of a far more ancient Phronist gathering thousands of years before. He walked a continuous route over the four walls, always going counterclockwise. At each cornerstone he chanted a brief phrase: at the first corner he said "I ponder the passing of this darkness into light and the Essence flows"; at the second "I observe my thoughts objectively and the currents divide"; at the third "I choose the noble course and the flow nourishes me"; and at the fourth "I drink of its waters and awake to a new light"; and so on. A neophyte Phronist came up to Buddha after watching his progress. "Why do you walk forever in such a route?" the neophyte asked. "You get nowhere." "Do you not hear my chant?" Buddha responded. "It is a form of meditation. I walk to celebrate the infinite, circular journey of life, a journey into light, which has no beginning, no end and no destination." "Wasn't it you who advised us to follow our own hearts to find meaning in life and to always enjoy its bounty? You seem to plod this worn and dreary path without purpose. Is there not so much more to life than this?" "This is a great joy," said Buddha. "Everyone celebrates life in a different way. You must respect this facet of nature. You say I am walking without purpose upon these hallowed ruins, but your argument applies to any other action in life as well. The meaning is what we apply to it, there is no pre-ordained or mandated purpose. Each person's journey is his destination." "But why do you enjoy life in this way that seems so tedious?" the neophyte wrinkled his brow into deep furrows. "Do you find it tedious already? You should build more fortitude if you are already exhausted before taking your first step. For me this is an old familiar way to contemplate on past events and better understand the Essence, but for you this is an unexplored path. If you sincerely believe that it will bring ruin then you have good reason to avoid it, otherwise you are depriving yourself of a possible path among many." Buddha then continued his circuit. Another Phronist soon entered the Quadrangle. She looked around and saw two others walking around the rim of the Quadrangle, chanting at each cornerstone. Curious, she climbed the ancient stone steps and waited until they approached her. "Why do you walk forever in such a route?" she asked. "You get nowhere."

Also, in READ BEFORE POSTING it looks like the last [] is missing the slash to show that it's closing the url tag.

To arms! To arms! A call through the land Go fetch your sword, and keep it at hand Some cloth you'll need if anything bleeds And spear nearby for upcoming deeds Before your chest, a buckler possess To best avoid a serious mess Prepare to fill the catapult's cup The ammo's hot, don't bungle it up Our troops amass and take up their place They'll move as one -- this isn't a race But first, before the upcoming drive Recite your prayers (I'm sure you'll survive)

Oddly, for these purple folders, I've noticed that they haven't always been changing from the light-colored purple to the deeper-colored purple to indicate that there's been a new post. (Maybe because I'm using Google Chrome? Is anyone else noticing the same thing?) A minor glitch compared to the overall usefulness of being able to indicate when a riddle is solved though. Whenever you think it's ironed out enough to start implementing in the logic and word forums, give us the word.

Neat trick with inserting the url link into the Poll Choice! I would recommend adding an explanation to step 4; otherwise people are likely to think that the post # within the thread is the one they should use in the url tag, not the internal post # kept by the forum, which would create problems since the poll isn't editable: If you reply to the post containing the solution, you can find its post number within the bracketed text that will appear in the top line of the editor. You can create a link to that post by using that number in url tags: {post=178736}this post{/post}. (Of course use square brackets in the explanation; I had to use curlys instead so it would show up as text in this reply) Edit: I just noticed that you can click on the number of the post in the upper right when you're viewing the forum to get a direct link to that post. That would probably be easier to use as a way of setting up the link with regular sort of linkage instead of the that BB Code uses. Perhaps that's what should be pointed out in the instructions instead. You can get a hyperlink address to the post with the correct answer by clicking its number in the upper right corner. Then use that hyperlink in url tags like so: {url=http://brainden.com/forum/index.php?s=&showtopic=9229&view=findpost&p=178721}this post{/url}

I like the revision to the Mahavira parable; it both presents things in an revelationary sort of way that seems appealing to a religious audience, and presents the Jainist concepts in the way that we're looking to establish them in Phronism. For the addition to the Seventh Shepherd's closing speech, to de-negativify it a little bit I would propose: Humanity struggles to fulfill our potential as it emanates from the Essence, and much remains to be learned and understood. Connecting with the Essence is an endless quest along a path that will be increasingly revealed as humanity parts the veil of the unknown through reason and sober study. While science reveals the mechanics of nature, it remains silent on our overall purpose, and for this we turn to the Essence. Purpose implies a need to act, which is done not with sacrifices, nor prayer, nor worship as they are now known. Sacrificing by surrendering your possessions is not action; true sacrifice is forsaking your own comfort to help your fellow man. Praying by saying to the Essence what is already known is not action; true prayer is contemplation and exposing yourself to new ideas to guide your deeds. Worshiping by engaging in rituals is not action; true worship is defined through our Acts of Legacy that will endure throughout time. To harmonize with the Essence: Help others, be generous, be reliable. Do not harm others, steal, or lie. Learn throughout your childhood, and fulfill your potential as an adult. Find something you do well that will benefit society and do it. Understand at all times that faith is a supplement to, and not a supplanter of, reason; it is a way to see the world that will lead to fulfillment, and its worth is measured by the degree to which it accomplishes this goal. Regarding the idea of just keeping the purpose part of the monk parable: looking at the paragraph above and comparing that to the story of a monk walking around in circles reciting chants for hours made me realize that there might be a problem here. The underlying message of finding your own purpose in life is an important one though and I'll try to find another way of getting it across. Also, one of my motives for exploring the Prisoner's Dilemma a bit more was to see if we might have several modern concepts that we would want to include in Phronism along with the purpose and free will concepts that the monk parable was getting at. If so then including a small set of modern parables as well as the Samarkand ones might be worthwhile, which would mean that the Newtonian part of the monk parable could be placed in the 17th century and really address the concepts it's aiming at head-on without sticking out as the only non-500 BC one. I sympathize with octopuppy's reaction that raising a determinism vs free will debate might just unnecessarily stir up a hornet's nest; but since the Essence is basically all the laws of cause and effect rolled up into one thing, it sounds like the type of thing that people might try to blame for their own shortcomings with a determinism-type argument. As long as a determinism vs free will parable reaches the conclusion that people are responsible for their actions, it might be worth exploring. These last two paragraphs could give us something to work on for the next little bit.

All right, that has me convinced: slyalys has a perfectly acceptable (and punny) alternate answer. As for the other one: I'm afraid I don't know enough about how to go about scoring some smack to say how well it could fit the first two lines. Might be a regional thing...

Thanks, MrsP! Can I go ahead and introduce this to the New Word Riddles forum when my next riddle is solved and see how it goes? I'll include the following instructions: Riddle authors may choose to show that a riddle has been solved by changing it from a regular thread into a poll. After an acceptable solution has been posted, when the riddle's author posts a reply to confirm that the answer is correct, click the option at the top of the editor: "Click here to manage this topic’s poll". The poll does not need to have a title, but the author will need to click "Add Poll Question" and type something in the box that appears (like Solved), and will need to click "Add Poll Choice" and type something in the box that appears (like which post number the solution is on), as well as the regular text for a reply posting. After the reply is posted, the riddle’s folder will be purple and the poll’s text will appear at the top of the window when people view the thread. Be aware that after the poll has been made it cannot be edited, and people may still post to the thread after it is converted to a poll. And when I introduce it to the forum, I would also say: While we introduce this to BrainDen, please DO NOT go back and mark all of your old riddles as solved – that would end up bumping all of the currently active riddles from the front of the forum's list! Just start marking the current and new riddles as they are solved.

Any volunteers? This could potentially go in the Important: READ BEFORE POSTING message. Riddle authors may choose to show that a riddle has been solved by changing it from a regular thread into a poll. After an acceptable solution has been posted, when the riddle's author posts a reply to confirm that the answer is correct, click the option at the top of the editor: "Click here to manage this topic’s poll". The poll does not need to have a title, but the author will need to click "Add Poll Question" and type something in the box that appears (like Solved), and will need to click "Add Poll Choice" and type something in the box that appears (like which post number the solution is on). After the reply is posted, the riddle’s folder will be purple and the poll’s text will appear at the top of the window when people view the thread. Be aware that after the poll has been made it cannot be edited, and people may still post to the thread after it is converted to a poll.

Not patient enough to wait a full hour. Hopefully this is a purple folder now. If we do encourage people to flag when riddles are solved by turning them into polls with a pointer to the post with the answer, I suggest that we also ask them NOT to go through all their old riddles to flag them since that would bump a bunch of old riddles to the front. Just start flagging new riddles as they get solved. And it would be useful to have instructions somewhere saying that it's important to have something typed in both "Poll Content" and at least one "Poll Choice" added to make it turn into a poll -- that part wasn't initially obvious. Edit: and also let people know to be careful when they turn the thread into a poll: there's no way to go back and change the poll once it's set up, even within the 10 minutes!

I'll start the thread now and try to come back in an hour to put up a poll indicating that this thread has been solved. (It is important that the thread not be a poll when it is initially posted.)

They're not chilly-hearted, but points for the comedy.