When i was on vacation and someone randomly handed me a pamphlet titled "where is your destination" *looks around for it* ahhh found it... It has a map of georgia on the cover and a truck...
anyways it says this (comments in green):
[pamphlit]
Where were you dispatched on your last trip? (New York, where i got THIS) Where are you going now? (At the time, Wicked) As a trucker, (What?) Your goal is to arrive safely at your destination. There is no certainty that you will arrive safely, but you will use all of your skills as a truck driver (When did i become a truck driver?) to attain this goal. (ok...)
However, there is a final destination that you have total control over. (read on, and you'll see i dont) At the end of your life, you will be dispatched (well that's one way to put it) either to heaven or hell. It's your choice to make. (agian, read on and you'll see it's not) Your company (God & Co.?) will have no say-so (really?) on this trip, because you are you're own dispatcher, (kay, than ill go to heaven, don't need to worry) and you have the opportunity to choose your own destination.
You could choose to spend eternity in hell, where you would suffer pain, agony, and anguish forever. Wouldn't you rather live in a place of no pain, sorrow, worries, trials, temptations, and failures? None of these exist in heaven; instead, heaven is a place of peace and happiness forever. (i must be in hell already cause i'm a temptation to make a joke here...) The Bible says that heaven has twelve foundations made of precious stones, streets of gold, walls of jasper, gates of pearl, and a refreshing river of life flowing through it. (I thought we were dead) Wouldn't you regret missing a place like this for your final destination? Sure you would! (I thought I got to decide!) Jesus, God's Son, does not want you to miss heaven either. (Then why are you later saying they're damning us to hell? Plus I thought i already chose heaven!!) When He spoke to His disciples, He told them, "In my Father's house are many mansions...I go to prepare a place for you." (John 14:2). Jesus will prepare a place for you as well, if you will simply accept the payment He has already made for you. He shed His blood and willingly gave His life for you, so your eternal destination will be in heaven.
As a truck driver, (how'd we get back to this?) You follow a map to arrive at your destination. The Bible also gives a map which you must followin order to become a Christian and live for all eternity in heaven. (Wait - I already chose heaven. I thought God loved all of us, not just Christians. If that's so, why can only Christians go to heaven???)
ROMANS' MAP TO HEAVEN
The first stop is that you must realize you are a sinner. As the Bible states, "As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one:" (Romans 3:10) "For all have sinned, and come short the glory of God;" (Romans 3:23) So your saying there's no point in being good, cause im going to hell anyways cause i sinned? And if there is NO chance whatsoever of my being good, why should i try to be all pure and saintly?
The second stop on the Roman's map is that you must realize that your sin has an eternal cost. Romans 6:23 states, "For the wages of sin is death..." This death is eternal separation for God in hell. Kind funny how it says "God in hell," huh? anyways, so now im going to die. but don't we all? so i've already sinned because i was born. is that why we all die?
The third stop is that you must know that you cannot save yourself or pay the cost of your sin. The Bible says, "Therefore by the deeds of the law there shall no flesh be justified in his sight..." (Romans 3:20) So I already know that i was born sinful, and going to die anyways, and i CANT go to heaven, although you told me in the beggining that i should want to go to heaven. isn't this like taunting me??? I mean, REALLY!
Next, you must realize that God has provided the way for you to be saved. (but didn't you just say...) "But God commendeth his love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8) That's so funny! i could have sworn you had just said that there was no way to be saved. your taunting me AGIAN!
Your fifth stop on the Romans' Map is that you must place your complete faith in Jesus Christ. The Bible states (funny how im seeing this a lot...) "Even the righteousness of God which is by faith of Jesus Christ unto all and upon all then that believe..." (Romans 3:22). "That if thou shalt confess with thy heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved." Again: I thought you said i was damned for eternity. So now your adding a bit of reincarnation into the mix. Karma. I thought you said that God forgives. If so, than why are we damned because we're born?
Do you believe that Jesus Christ alone can save you? (No, I thought God could too...) He will, if you will simply ask Him. (AGAIN: Why are you contradicting yourself so often!!!) "For whosoever shall coll upon the name of the Lord shall be saved." (Romans 10:13). (You know what I would say here) If you will accept Jesus Christ as your Savior, please pray this prayer or one similar to it: (Here we go...) Dear, God, I admit I am a sinner, going to hell. (Back with that sinner thing so soon?) I know that I cannot save myself. (But you just said...) I repent of my sins (being born...) and put my faith in the blood that you shed for me on the cross to pay for all my sins. ***In blue because see what follows this bit of Christianity*** I now accept you as my Savoir (BUT I CAN'T BE SAVED!!!!) and trust you to take me to heaven. (But you just said i can't be saved. in this PRAYER!!! I mean, seriously?) Thank you for saving me. (WHAT THE HECK??? Can you say Hypocrite????) Amen.
[/pamphlit]
***Why would god sacrifice his son if we're sinned cause we're born? Jesus helped him, loved him, and he kills him. Not the kind of Father son relationship id like to have. He killed him to save us, who just happened to be a hopeless case. I REALLY dont understand this part. would someone PLEASE explain it to me!! LJ?
So yah - im done. hows that for a thing to brighten your day?