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Pandas would never run in the first place.

What is it called when a man talks dirty to a woman? Sexual harassment. What is it when a woman talks dirty to a man? $3.99 a minute.

Some co-workers decide to hit the local bar for a few drinks after work. The following work day those who attended the bar were discussing what a great time they had. One guy said, "I had fun but think I drank too much because when I got home I BLEW Chuncks!" His friend replied, "No way! Those drinks made you sick?" The guy answers, "No . . . Chuncks is my DOG!"

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender that if he can show him something amazing that he's never seen before, can he drink for free that night. The bartender agrees and the man pulls a little piano out of his bag. The bartender scoffs and says "I've seen a piano before, even a small one" The man says "Hang on, I'm not done yet" and pulls out a man about a foot tall. The man starts to play the piano and the bartender says "Ok, you win. That's amazing. I've never seen this before, you can drink for free." After a while of letting the man drink for free, the bartender starts asking him how he got this, the man replies that he has a magic lamp that grants just one wish. The bartender ends up buying the magic lamp off of the guy and says "I wish for a million bucks." Suddenly a million ducks burst into the bar and the bartender looks at the man and yells "What is wrong with this thing? I wish for a million bucks, not ducks!" The man looks right back at him and yells "What? And you thought I wished for a 12 inch pianist?"