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Once, on a foreign j

ourney, while driving far in G

ermany, I crashed my car inj

uring myself.

Vacations are for enj

oying yourself,

not dest

roying yourself.

------------------------------

So now when i rhyme orange

I simply take a lozenge.

Usually at Stone Henge

------------------------------

Also discombubulate,

The disco we love to hate

A little risky on a date!

------------------------------

To rhyme silver

I ware real fur

------------------------------

But when I try purple

My head is like a whirlpool

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Dearest creature in Creation,

Studying English pronunciation,

I will teach you in my verse

Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.

I will keep you, Susy, busy,

Make your head with heat grow dizzy;

Tear in eye, your dress you'll tear.

So shall I! Oh, hear my prayer.

Pray, console your loving poet,

Make my coat look new, dear, sew it!

Just compare heart, beard, and heard,

Dies and diet, lord and word,

Sword and sward, retain and Britain.

(Mind the latter, how it's written.)

Made has not the sound of bade,

Say -- said, pay -- paid, laid, but plaid.

Now I surely will not plague you

With such words as vague [plaque?] and ague,

But be careful how you speak,

Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;

Previous, precious, fuchsia, via:

Pipe, snipe, recipe and chair,

Cloven, oven; how and low,

Script, receipt; shoe, poem, toe,

Hear me say, devoid of trickery,

Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore,

Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles,

Exiles, similes, reviles;

Wholly, holly, signal, signing;

Thames, examining, combining;

Scholar, vicar, and cigar,

Solar, mica, war and far;

From "desire": desirable -- admirable from "admire,"

Lumber, plumber, bier but brier:

Chatham, brougham; renown but known,

Knowledge done, but gone and tone,

One, anemone; Balmoral,

Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel;

Gertrude, German, wind and mind;

Scene, Melpomene, mankind.

Tortoise, turquoise, chamois-leather,

Reading, Reading, heathen, heather,

This phonetic labyrinth

Gives moss, gross, brook, brooch, ninth and plinth,

Billet does not rhyme with ballet,

Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet.

Blood and flood are not like food,

Nor is mould like should and would,

Banquet is not nearly parquet,

Which is said to rhyme with "darky."

Viscous, viscount; load and broad;

Toward, to forward, to reward.

And your pronunciation's O.K.

When you say correctly croquet;

Rounded, wounded; grieve and sieve;

Friend and fiend; alive and live.

Liberty, library; heave and heaven;

Rachel, ache, moustache; eleven.

We say hallowed but allowed,

People, leopard; towed but vowed.

Mark the difference moreover

Between mover, cover, and clover;

Leeches, breeches; wise, precise;

Chalice, but police and lice.

Camel, constable, unstable;

Principle, disciple; label,

Petal, penal, and canal;

Wait, surprise, plait, promise, pal.

Suit, suite, run circuit, conduit,

Rhyme with "Shirk it" and "beyond it."

But it is not hard to tell,

Why it's Pall Mall, pall mall.

Muscle, muscular; gaol, iron;

Timber, climber, bullion, lion;

Worm and storm; chaise, chaos, chair;

Senator, spectator, mayor.

Ivy, privy; famous, clamour

And enamour rhyme with hammer.

Pussy, hussy, and possess.

Desert but dessert, address;

Golf, wolf; countenance; lieutenants

Hoist, in lieu of flags, left pennants.

River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb;

Doll and roll and some and home.

Stranger does not rhyme with anger,

Neither does devour with clangour.

Soul but foul and gaunt but aunt

Font, front, wont; want, grand, and grant,

Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger,

And then singer, ginger, linger.

Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge, and gauge;

Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age.

Query does not rhyme with very,

Nor does fury sound like bury.

Dost, lost, post, and doth, cloth, loth.

Job, job, blossom, bosom, oath

Though the difference seems little,

We say actual but victual.

Seat, sweat, chaste and caste: Leigh, eight and height,

Put, nut, granite but unite,

Refer does not rhyme with deafer.

Feoffer does, and zephyr, heifer.

Dull, bull; Geoffrey, George ate late,

Hint, pint, senate and sedate;

Scenic, Arabic, pacific;

Science, conscience, scientific.

Tour, but our, succour, four,

Gas, alas, and Arkansas.

Sea, idea, guinea, area,

Psalm, Maria, but malaria.

Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean.

Doctrine, turpentine, marine.

Compare alien with Italian,

Dandelion with battalion,

Sally with ally; yea, ye,

Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, key, quay!

Say aver, but ever, fever,

Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver.

Never guess -- it is not safe;

We say calves, valves, half but Ralph!

Heron; granary, canary,

Crevice and device and aerie;

Face, but preface, but efface.

Phlegm, phlegmatic; a**, glass, bass.

Large, but target, gin, give, verging.

Ought, out, joust, and scour, but scourging

Ear, but earn, and wear and tear

Do not rhyme with here but ere.

Seven is right, but so is even;

Hyphen, roughen, nephew, Stephen,

Monkey, donkey, clerk, and jerk;

Asp, grasp, wasp; and cork and work.

Pronunciation -- think of psyche!

Is a paling stout and spikey?

Won't it make you lose your wits,

Writing groats and saying grits?

It's a dark abyss or tunnel,

Strewn with stones, like rowlock, gunwale,

Islington and Isle of Wight,

Housewife, verdict and indict.

Don't you think so, reader, rather,

Saying lather, bather, father?

Finally: which rhymes with enough--

Though, through, plough, cough, hough, or tough?

Hiccough has the sound of cup.

My advice is -- give it up!

Edited by itachi-san
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Once, on a foreign j

ourney, while driving far in G

ermany, I crashed my car inj

uring myself.

Vacations are for enj

oying yourself,

not dest

roying yourself.

------------------------------

So now when i rhyme orange

I simply take a lozenge.

Usually at Stone Henge

------------------------------

Also discombubulate,

The disco we love to hate

A little risky on a date!

------------------------------

To rhyme silver

I ware real fur

------------------------------

But when I try purple

My head is like a whirlpool

Orange you glad you posted this.? O range O home on the range. NO? Okay no more cornge.

Edited by akaslickster
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Apparently, there are two proper nouns in the English language that rhyme with orange. Gorringe is a common surname and Blorenge is the name of a hill in Wales and is also a surname. If you don't believe me, google it.

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