[Guest]

Well... the reason why i made this thread is because I've been telling alot of stories lately. Mostly about my life but about other things. In the thread "Reason for Break-ups" i told them about my different girlfriends and all that stuff and they said i should start my own thread for that. Not sure if they were being serious or not but here i am making it official. The last story i said was this one...

So this was the beggining of summer last year... around mayish. There was this girl that liked me, not the prettiest of girls and she was fat... like 200 and she was only 5 feet tall. She liked me though, and she was pretty in a way. So I asked her out and for the next week everything was fine. She turned out to be a crazy "*****". The reason why i would say that is becasue she always came over to my house and she would want to be alone with me. EIther in my room or outside she would want me to kiss her and all that stuff. I really didnt do much with her since she always craved it, i'm that sort of guy... if you want it REALLY badly enough thats a turn off for me. Then again it depends who you are and what you mean in my life. So anyway as i said she would pull me in some dark corner and try to basicly "f***". Excuse me for my language but thats the best term that describes it. My father didnt like her that much since i have a little sister and she was catching up on things on what my gf did. We spent countless nights arguing over her... and finally a night came when i was out with a few different girls. No not a date... just hanging out of sorts. When i came home that night my father told me she called at 11:30 that night and wanted to know if i was there. She was convinced that my father was me and started to flirt with him. He kept saying that no this was his father and he wasnt here right now. Well it turned out she was stoned and heavily drunk that night and so thought it would be funny to call my house. Well when i found that out i was furious at her and broke up with her as soon as i set my eyes on her. I told her we were thorugh forever. She told me no that we can work this out all we need to do is talk and blah blah blah. I told... well screamed at her no that there is nothing to talk about, that she was high and drunk and called my house at 11:30, So we were through for good and i never wanted to see her again. Did she take it that hard... no, she wasnt crying or anything. Makes me wonder what i really meant to her but it was just a phaze i was in. As you all know that girl i fell really hard for i just broke up with her a few months before that and i really wanted my heart to be mended. No i did not use her, did i like her all that much, probably not now that i look back on it. But she did mean something to me.. maybe if she lost alot of weight she would of looked drop dead amazing. I have an eye like that... i tend to see on the inside and not so much on the outside. So in the end i never saw her again... she did go to my school but i am not sure where she is right now. She emailed me on my B-day... told me happy birthday, i was suprized that she remembered and told her thanks.

Ah and the girl i am dating right now, we have been going out for a month and a half... give or take a few days. Everything is....fine...ish. She got into a car accident 2 days ago and her mum took her car away, kicked her out of the house, and told her that we had to break up. Ha, AS IF!!!! Thats the last thing on her mind. Although she was convinced that i wanted to break up with her because of that and was crying when she told me all of this. I looked at her if she was an alien and told her thats the very very very very very very very last thing on my mind. Breaking up usually is, you have to do something very stupid to make me break up with you, like cheat on me... thats a HUGE thing with me. Scotch tape and glue cant hold my heart together forever........

Well now you know about the girls i have dated... actually there is one more but this is getting to be a bit to long and class is going to start soon. There is one reason why i date a girl for such a long period of time. And it's not like any ordinary girl, it has to be a girl that just full on blows my head into the water (AND I LIVE IN ARIZONA!!!! =D) Just something about her so it is love at first sight. Nothing inbetween.... If i want to date a girl i make it as real as it comes. Then again i hate being alone... i'm terrified of it... heh, you guys should here some of the nightmares i have! (another story time... not today, just ask and i will tell you guys, if you want to know still) Demons eating me alive... tearing at my stomac, ripping my guts out..... feeling every ounce of pain. Having acid poured on me....... just a preview of what is to come

I have three other stories to tell... but thats later, now please... let me hear your story

[Guest]

Sucks to see a thread not work out the way you planned, eh?

Well, I didn't post because well.. I'm young, you know, I haven't gone through much. Stories seem to be better from people who've been around the bend, and I'm just taking my first turn.

So yeah, I'm just waiting for another one of your stories, I like them

[Guest]

Mine isn't done yet.

And, what there is of it reads like a Shakespearean tragedy. So, we'll save that for tomorrow.

[Guest]

I am 37 yo... too much story to tell. Here is a hint...

my father went to Burning man at 70 yo with his buddies.

Lets just say the apple doesnt fall far from the tree.

[Yoruichi-san]

Have to start out a story the right way, even if they don't all end in "and they lived happily ever after"...

Once upon a time there was a chubby-faced little Chinese girl. She immigrated to the United States with her parents when she was 3 1/2. Her parents, being immigrants, didn't have any money and worked in a Chinese restaurant while they got their higher education degrees. Since they didn't have money to buy the little girl toys or anything, they decided the best course of action was to cut the problem at the stem. Instead of being like most parents and telling their children they couldn't have this toy or that toy when the child asked for it, they told their little girl that she shouldn't want anything (so that she wouldn't ask them for anything), that "wanting" was selfish and the worst thing she could be was selfish. Being a little girl, the child didn't understand their intentions, but took their lesson to heart and learned not to want anything for herself.

The child was also very smart, but her parents didn't want her to ever become complacent, so they never praised her. When she won 2 first places and 1 second place in a 3 category math competition, they simply told her (in Chinese): "You will do better next year". Again, the child did not understand her parents' intentions and took this to mean that she was not good enough, that she was never good enough. The result was that the little girl thought the only thing she was allowed to want was to be the best, and that was the only thing that would make her good enough for her parents to love her. She also developed an inner voice that constantly reminded her of her own failures and that she was never good enough.

Needless to say, this child had no self-confidence. She could not make friends. It didn't help matters that her intelligence made her the Teacher's Pet, even though she never wanted to be. And what made things the worst was that the few friends she did make all ended up betraying her to step up the social ladder. She would be nice to them, and tell them things about herself, which they in turn took and used to make fun of her so that the other kids would accept them.

So the child grew up with a strong sensitivity to betrayal. Due to this, she could never really let anyone in close to her. She had a tendency towards self-sabotage and pushing herself to her limits until she failed and could berate herself some more. She was miserable and friendless until she went off to college. There she met people like her, people who were smart and didn't care about social standings. People who could appreciate her for who she was. She got involved in student government in college because she found that she could really make a difference and since she grew up thinking she couldn't care about herself, she had that much more to put into caring about others.

Somewhere along the line, she realized that there was one thing she could let herself succeed at, at helping others to learn and to understand, at sharing her ideas and her creativity, at challenging herself and others. She could share her ideas, her mind, her sense of humor (which was developed mostly as a defense mechanism). The one thing she could never sabotage was her own creative thinking abilities and the things that stemmed from it.

And that's how she ended up here. :/

The End...(for now)...

[unreality]

Wow *claps* I thought you were Japanese, not Chinese, btw ;D

[Yoruichi-san]

Wow *claps* I thought you were Japanese, not Chinese, btw ;D

Lol...well, you learn something new every day...;P

[Guest]

Lol...well, you learn something new every day...;P

I could only said "wow" after reading your stories.

Now I start suspecting whether Itachi-san is an Irish....

[Guest]

I could only said "wow" after reading your stories.

Now I start suspecting whether Itachi-san is an Irish....

I am surprised too, I thought YS is from The Land of the Rising Sun

[Guest]

Being a little girl, the child didn't understand their intentions, but took their lesson to heart and learned not to want anything for herself.

I guess all parents wants their child to improve, be a wee-bit better. One cannot compromise with one's parents as they are the only one you will ever have. Other relationship might change, one can get another hubby, wife .. etc. A parents love for their child cannot be questioned.

[Yoruichi-san]

I guess all parents wants their child to improve, be a wee-bit better. One cannot compromise with one's parents as they are the only one you will ever have. Other relationship might change, one can get another hubby, wife .. etc. A parents love for their child cannot be questioned.

Yes, yes...but being older and mature enough to understand what the parents' intentions were don't change the way they shaped the naive child who could not understand these things...

[Guest]

Yes, yes...but being older and mature enough to understand what the parents' intentions were don't change the way they shaped the naive child who could not understand these things...

True, and I am glad you realize these things. Now you can actively work on making your life whatever you wish it to be.

[Guest]

Huh? My story? Okay. It was never easy for me. I was born a poor black child. I remember the days, sittin' on the porch with my family, singin' and dancin' down in Mississippi... Oh wait! That's Navin R. Johnson's story!

My real story. Things were always pretty easy for me. I was born a wealthy white child. I remember the days, swimming in our pool with my sisters, and playing hide-and-seek in our 4500 sq ft home in the suburbs of Kansas City. I was the middle child of three sisters, so I often fell through the cracks of my parents' attention...because of this I honed my skills as class clown and boy-magnet. I began attending church by myself whan I was 15 and dedicated my life to Christ shortly thereafter. Within the following decade, the rest of my family would also choose to believe in Jesus...each a few years in between. I attended Kansas State University and had a double major of Art and Psychology which I combined for an Art Therapy degree. After I graduated I decided that Art Therapy was pretty lame so, through a progression of career changes, I eventually became an Accountant.

I married a wonderful man that I met at church. We met and married within the span of 5 months. Two years later we adopted our first son and I left my accounting job to become a full-time mom. Three and a half years later a stork broke out of the clouds and dropped a second son on our doorstep which totally caught us off-guard, but it took us all of a milisecond to fall in love with him. Sometimes staying home can get pretty boring...and after 6 years out of the workforce I felt my brain was turning into that nasty gloop that mechanics use to remove axel grease from under their fingernails. I took up cross-words and suduko and a few online "thinking" games which I quickly mastered and grew tired of. So I went in search of something more challenging...a search for logic puzzles (a favorite past-time) turned up BrainDen. I quickly became a member and, except for a week's hiatus, NEVER left!

Oh, and by the way, Y-san & the rest of you non-parents: no matter how good your intentions are, how many parenting classes you take, how much support and prayer you're given, you will ALWAYS f**k-up your kids. That's just part of the process, I've learned. The main thing is that you continue to love them even though you are bound to scar them for life. With enough time and therapy, they most-often will come to love you back.

Edited September 19, 2008 by puzzlegirl

[Yoruichi-san]

Oh, and by the way, Y-san & the rest of you non-parents: no matter how good your intentions are, how many parenting classes you take, how much support and prayer you're given, you will ALWAYS f**k-up your kids. That's just part of the process, I've learned. The main thing is that you continue to love them even though you are bound to scar them for life. With enough time and therapy, they most-often will come to love you back.

I do love my parents. And now that I'm old enough to understand their intentions I don't blame them. I actually don't believe in blame, but that's a philosophy discussion that involves quantum physics...;P. It's not about being mad at the past, that's pointless. It's about understanding what makes a person who they are and figuring out how to use that to their advantage, like what CP was saying. :/

And I'm glad to hear you have a wonderful family.

[Guest]

And I'm glad to hear you have a wonderful family.

My life wasn't always as charmed as it reads in my previous post. I've waded through my fair share of crap and struggled every step of the way. But who doesn't? Each of us has a story of woe...but each of us also has a story of triumph. I went to therapy for 5 years when I was a child, I wet the bed until I was 12, I engaged in unhealthy relationships with men in college... Like I said, parents are bound to f*-up their kids in one way or another. It is putting aside the history of woe and gaining momentum from each new triumph that propels one into a more satisfying existance.

Edit: Oh, and Y-san, I guessed you were Chinese. As for I-san, he could be from Saturn for all I know. I think he enjoys being mysterious.

Edited September 19, 2008 by puzzlegirl

[Yoruichi-san]

My life wasn't always as charmed as it reads in my previous post. I've waded through my fair share of crap and struggled every step of the way. But who doesn't? Each of us has a story of woe...but each of us also has a story of triumph. I went to therapy for 5 years when I was a child, I wet the bed until I was 12, I engaged in unhealthy relationships with men in college... Like I said, parents are bound to f*-up their kids in one way or another. It is putting aside the history of woe and gaining momentum from each new triumph that propels one into a more satisfying existance.

I meant your current family, being married to a wonderful man and having good children. I know that no one can ever be completely happy and everyone will always have problems. And my story wasn't meant to be of woe...it was mean to be of truth, of enlightenment, and of acceptance. Through education and introspection I came to understand and accept the factors that shaped me. I can't change how I grew up and how that affected me. But, like I said, I can try to figure out how to use those things to my advantage instead of disadvantage. I can't get rid of the inner voice, but I can talk back to it, especially when I kick some intellectual @$$. And I thought my story was one of triumph at the end...of understanding what made me who I am and figuring out how to put that to good use: i.e. sharing my puzzles and writing and sense of humor...;P

[Guest]

And I thought my story was one of triumph at the end...of understanding what made me who I am and figuring out how to put that to good use:

Yours is a story of triumph! I didn't write that whole spiel as a response to your story as much as a lesson for the younger crowd who may be going through crap at home or in their life and things seem hopeless. I just wanted to tell them to perservere because the tides DO turn!

Edit: Now who's next?

Edited September 19, 2008 by puzzlegirl

[Guest]

Sorry, I don't have much of a life story...seeing as I haven't had much of a life (only 14 years 3 of which I can't remember) but I'll be happy to read everyone elses

~Kat

[Guest]

I attended Kansas State University and had a double major of Art and Psychology which I combined for an Art Therapy degree.

I'm actually doing something similar, getting my degree in Graphic Design then going to go get a PhD in Psychology, while basing my thesis around the study of art therapy.

Anyway i suppose I'll go next.

I was born in North Hollywood to lower-class parents. I had a dad who would haul cables and lights around on movie sets and a mom who smoked cigs and weed and drank too much and worked at a plant nursery. At the age of 5 my dad kicked my mom out of our apartment because he hated seeing her intoxicated or drugged up around me. My dad moved up in the industry to the head of the electric department aka 'gaffer' or 'chief lighting technician' and started to move up out of the lower class. after the shock of being kicked out, my mother sobered up and moved back home within 6 weeks. A couple years later we moved out of our apartment in the city and got a house in the desert. It was then that I was told that I was half deaf. (i never really realized it as I'd never known anything different) A hearing aid was given to me which only proved to be a source of ridicule and evil children poking fun at me. As a result I became a bit of a loner, I was always drawing or reading or playing with my LEGOs. I began to tackle Poe, Frost, London and various other writers of 'the classics' in third grade. I was moved to a different school in the 5th grade. I decided to create a new persona. i ditched the hearing aid, cut my hair, and got new clothes. visually I was different, but inside i was still a nerd. I was given my first computer at the age of 10. Ever since I've always been a bit of a computer nerd. throughout middle school, i became very lax in my studies. Being accepted was more important than good grades. Before a B was unacceptable, now a C was good enough. High School was the biggest transition for me. Being small (5'0 115lbs) I was always worried about Freshman hazing or getting the cr*p kicked out of me. I was never noticed by the girl I had crushes one so instead i sat in the far corners of the room to remain unnoticed. I would observe the popular guys and the guys who seemed to have lack of confidence. I studied their movements, body language, how they talked, what they said, etc. I began to psycho analyze everyone around me. I'd ask why are they doing this, why is that person reacting this way or that. My junior year I sprung up to 5'6 and gained another 30lbs. I also developed a sense of humor and a repertoire of flirts. I was finally being noticed and began to felt accepted. My Senior year was probably the worst as far as my reputation went. I grew another 5-6 inches, bulked up in muscle to 185lbs, further developed my sense of humor and became a pro at flirting. I gained the rep of a heart breaker. I felt that this was my way of getting back at all the girls who rejected me when i was short and scrawny and decided to take notice when i changed physically.

I moved away from home for college the fall quarter immediately following my high school graduation. I was 18, single and had my own apartment. I had fun. It was all about sex, drugs, and rock & roll...ok well maybe switch drugs with hookah, and rock with hip hop, r&b, and 80s metal. almost three years have past since then. I moved back home a year ago because the price of school, gas and living was much to large for me to handle. I calmed down when it came to girls. I figure it's time to mature and think with the right head. While sitting at work I found BD through a Google gadget and i'm here pretty much most of work and at school...which i should probably focus on more since I'm supposed to be graduating in March.

Oh and because of BD I've met the love of my life...the one and only puzzlegirl

[Guest]

Oh and because of BD I've met the love of my life...the one and only puzzlegirl

Oh cr@p, now you've done it! Slick has been pretty tolerant of me flirting around, but he's not going to like someone else claiming me as the love of thier life. You'd better keep a look out 'cause when Slick gets in a jealous rage there's no telling what he might do!

[Guest]

Oh cr@p, now you've done it! Slick has been pretty tolerant of me flirting around, but he's not going to like someone else claiming me as the love of thier life. You'd better keep a look out 'cause when Slick gets in a jealous rage there's no telling what he might do!

Heh heh

[Yoruichi-san]

I decided to create a new persona. i ditched the hearing aid, cut my hair, and got new clothes. visually I was different, but inside i was still a nerd.

Totally with you on that one ;P

Thanks for sharing!

[Guest]

Totally with you on that one ;P

Thanks for sharing!

Well thank you

and you are very welcome

[Guest]

Wow. What a wide range of people/experiences here! Is our common theme just that we're a bit geeky?

Just a short one from me to put the experience from the other side of the pond. But thinking about it, mine sounds all too lucky/privileged compared to some of the difficulties some of you had to deal with.

My parents sent me to boarding school at 7, which I loved as it meant never being bored. I was always a bit geeky and a bit 'sad' for most of my schooling but got away with it because I was relatively sporty. Spent my summers sailing every day and did ok at school. Then, when I was ten, my Dad killed himself following a difficult break up with my Mum and losing a lot of money through property/being a Lloyds name (lots of expensive disasters in the late 80s/early 90s). Unfortunately, that meant I had to leave my boarding school and went to a more local day school - not a good couple of years!

At school, I spent a lot of time doing computer things and always had a knack for making electronics just 'work' which didn't help my school image, but when I was about 13, I think I became concious of what it meant to be cool at school - I began to choose my actions/words much more carefully and didn't flaunt the fact that I was a geek. Luckily, I went back to boarding school at 13 and found it much easier to be clever and not automatically put in the 'sad' group.

I think my Dad dying made me want to prove myself a lot more. I always had a view of him that he was good at maths (I'm not sure he was that good - he did a history of art degree! - so I probably have built that up over the years) and so I tried to live up to the image of him that I percevied in my head. Luckily, I always got away with top grades and the minimum amount of work (honestly, I have been very lucky in this respect) and ended up studying maths/theoretical physics at a top uni.

Worryingly, university seems like a long time ago now and I feel like time is slipping away pretty quick. I had always assumed that I would be a millionaire by 25, but it doesn't seem to have happened yet. hmmm. better get working on it.

I do love my parents. And now that I'm old enough to understand their intentions I don't blame them. I actually don't believe in blame, but that's a philosophy discussion that involves quantum physics...;P. It's not about being mad at the past, that's pointless. It's about understanding what makes a person who they are and figuring out how to use that to their advantage, like what CP was saying. :/

And I'm glad to hear you have a wonderful family.

YS: Did you have a sudden realisation moment with your parents? or did it come on gradually as you looked back on your childhood? I had a big shock when I found out that part of my parents' breakup was because my mother was having an affair with a guy down the road - someone who at the time, and since, has been a very good family friend. I only discovered it when I was about 21 and have never spoken about it (or anything about my father's death) with her...

[Guest]

Hey Now, speak for yourselves, I was never geeky! I was quite popular actually and although I was in the gifted program, I was cool enough for it not to hurt my rep.

[Guest]

Hey Now, speak for yourselves, I was never geeky! I was quite popular actually and although I was in the gifted program, I was cool enough for it not to hurt my rep.

Thus you were geeky my dear...it's ok some of us are cool and geeky...thus making geeky cool....hmm which makes all the geeky people on this thread cool....which then makes all of us cool