Hope D's not mad, but....... Heyupal thinks you got it! 'Cept you spelled it wrong!

How do you spell it?

an illeist

A Phonograph record

I turned his wind-up round and round. (as a phonograph that you crank)

And waited to hear the tin-like sound (phonographs sound tinny)

The automaton was now marching on, (it plays automatically after cranking)

But he'd only last one season long. (it does not play forever)

It was time for life and love to start, (most common songs are about life and love)

Even though he had no heart. (there is a hole in the center of a record)

The automaton did start and stop. (one song stops and another starts)

What was it that made him walk?

(Is this the question or is the question or is the question what is "he"? If this is the question then the answer would be a "spring."

lol please use spoilers and nope its not a chem

You said that is wasn't a chem only to reveal later that it was chemical element ununoctium.

I think that you are missing the fact that elements are chemicals.

a jingle (an advertising song). Great now I've got the "meow mix song" stuck in my head again...thanks

round?

[Barber Paradox (Russell's Paradox)]

I though this sounded familiar then I realized I heard it on "Car Talk" on NPR a couple of years ago.

A Haircut in Horsetown, Part Deux

No one shaves the barber because the barber is a woman.

Huge Monkey!!! I love it. You are such a badass. It totally sounded like something from Burn Notice. I loved it.

Thanks lotus! When a "riddle" like this one does not really have clues I take it that we can make up any additional information that we want (to the point of ridiculousness)

CO (carbon monoxide written like a chemist would)

Operate (the opposite opposite?)

Together what each line must do. COOPERATE

but I am not sure.

Loom

This must be it! I was beginning to think this was not a good riddle but all of the clues fit. My monkey brain is just too stupid!

I helped a lady make a brand new blanket.

It was dark and heavy; she was so proud.

I describe how the blanket hung over her,

Protecting her from the dark rain cloud.

Sew? (helps lady make blanket)

(hangs on her just so)

needle, thread, thimble, stitch, bobbin, pin, shuttle, pattern?

Drape?

Security?

Punch the guard in the face and run down the hall. Pull the fire alarm and then immediately go through the door on the left. (no, not that one, the other one). Take the stairs to the roof. Throw a grenade behind you. Jump at th exact moment of the explosion (so as to remain unhurt) and grab the skid of a passing helicopter.

Knock on the door of the Helicopter and say, in a cooky high pitched voice, "Delivery!"

When the confused pilot opens the door, grab his shirt and throw him out of the helicopter. Quickly grab the controls and regain stability seconds before you crash into a giant balloon that is part of a parade passing below. Remember to fly low avoiding the first two missiles. The third missile is spiraling back toward you now! LOOK OUT! Do an amazing upside-down loop right in front of the missile launcher and at the last possible moment so that the missile hit the launch control tower and explodes in another fiery explosion. Whew! That was close...too close. Ditch the copter in the river and swim under a passing Tugboat. Grab its rudder. Swim to the shore when you are well clear of the action. Make your way to the safe house and lie low for a few days. DO NOT call your family because their phone is probably taped. After several days you will recieve word from head quarters that the whole thing has blown over and then you can continue normally, but not before you tell your boss off for for being an a-hole (which he is). He will put you on suspension and accuse you of orchestrating the whole thing. Now you only have one option that is to clear your name but this time with no badge and no gun.

Oh wait...did you say that your hands and feet are tied?

Scratch what I said earlier.

You are obviously a magician and magicians NEVER reveal there secrets.

I am not a magician so I will. Your hands and feet are not tied that tight and you can easily escape form them. Next either kick the windshield out or just open the car door, switch the water off, and exit the room through the door.

If that does not work try tinking about kittens that is what I alway do whenever I need to "escape".

I'm pretty sure this is right.

"most"? Surely the set of universes in which unreality survives will be an infinite set of the same cardinality as if he hadn't done it in the first place! What's he got to lose?

PS. Bagsie exclusive TV rights!

Although the number or alternate universes that spawn at any moment would be huge. They would still be finite because there is a finite amount of space, matter and time in each. It's pretty self evident that your free will (I'm trying to keep this on topic) is one of the factors that "choses" your particular path.

Each time you make a free-will decision (and the universe branches) a duplicate of the entire universe is not necessary. Only the local area around you, call it a "sphere of influence", would be needed. This would be the all of the universe that you could affect in your lifetime and would be similar to an event horizon. Even if you were to consider "yourself" as not merely being you the individual but all of humanity or even the Earth these things still have limited lifespans and therefore could only affect a limited portion of the universe.

There are already many TV shows movies that use this premise, but if you can do it better go right ahead

Yes!!!!!! This is the answer!!!! Please, be honest. Did you feel disappointed? Should I reword it?

Can you explain it please?

Comet Cup Ice Cream Cone?

http://www.amazon.com/Comet-Cream-Cones-12...s/dp/B000FA1572

EDIT: Right after I posted this I saw the answer

Quoting from the Wikipedia entry on dogma:

Dogma is the established belief or doctrine held by a religion, ideology or any kind of organization: it is authoritative and not to be disputed, doubted or diverged from.

Would you dare to question, dispute, doubt or diverge from the established consensus of science? Assuming you are not an expert, and therefore not capable of advancing the knowledge in the field, people would view you as a fool to start pontificating about new theories. No, you accept the dogma until the scientific authority figures tell you otherwise. Just like religion.

Again with the dogma. Scientific knowledge is not dogma because it welcomes doubt and dispute and is not absolute in nature. That is the entire basis of science. A non-scientists can choose to defer to a scientist about the veracity of a certain theory; because they know that the theory is derived from evidence obtained through independently verifiable experimentation that provides actual data as evidence. These "scientific authority figures" do not tell you what to believe based on nothing. They have come to their position only after the data has been verified and repeated independently. That is not the same as putting faith in something only because an authority figure says so as is the case with religious dogma.

I do concede that there have been cases where a certain Scientific theory is held on to by scientific authorities even after it has been disproven by others. I would say that this type of conservatism is a trait common of all human institutions and not one specific to Science itself. Fortunately, although there may be some lag in adopting, an incorrect theory will not persist long in the face of contrary evidence.

I am one who has left this place.

Rotting morbidly beneath the earth’s face.

I have rhythm, and don’t delay,

I am the cops route everyday.

Join us for someone you don’t want to know.

A leach, a no-gooder with his debts unpaid, so.

When a letter's recipient can't be found,

And defeat has brought you to the ground.

Where's my Dad? He's not around.

he is a "dead beat"

... a nail

Pound me on the head, and I’ll hold it tight. (hammer a nail)

Paint me a color, including pink, red, or white. (finger or toe nails)

Perform for an audience with utter perfection. (You nailed it.)

I once measured cloth, but don’t think in that direction.

???

[Y]ou could say that god designed the evolutionary process which LED to man.

The cool thing about evolution is that is is a completely undesigned process. You don't need have a creator for it to work, just take extremely simple, replicating, chemical processes and add time and you will get the levels of complexity that you see in biological life today. Although it is undesigned it it is not random. When two individuals compete for a limited resource such as food, territory or mates; the one that is best at at competing for this resource will tend to become more numerous over time. This non-random mechanism is natural selection.

It's "Y" (why)

I mark the spot, but X, I’m not. (x,y coordinates)

An interjection ,for a pause or reflection. (Why!)

Ask my question, for curious exp​ression. (Why?)

I like this one.

comma

Wow, this takes me back a bit! You make an interesting point. In theory if you were to invent an activity that was incredibly risky, but had sufficient randomness involved that it is (only just) possible to survive, and the only negative outcome was instant death, you might participate in it without fear, knowing that you would survive (in all the futures you continue to experience). Now that's taking thrill-seeking to the next level!

EDIT: Hmm, I'm thinking high-speed motorcycling around an obstacle course where the obstacles are large dangling mines, slightest touch and ka-blooey! No safety helmet required. Anyone want to give it a try?

Nooo! think of all of the duplicate versions of your family that would have to attend your funeral in most of the duplicate universes!