[Guest]

...as many of U kno...I am a wife, mother, and college student...but I cannot sit down and study or do my homework...*yells at Chay*...[she got milk on the celing]...do any of U have any advice on how 2 juggle college and real life?...please, I'm in danger of flunking out of my college...

[Izzy]

Paying attention in class generally works. As does consuming large, and uncannily unhealthy amounts of Monster. Caffeine, ergo study time.

[Guest]

Paying attention in class generally works. As does consuming large, and uncannily unhealthy amounts of Monster. Caffeine, ergo study time.

...caffeine makes me shake and thus affects my bakery skills as well as my handwriting...plus I have to get up at 4 am and currently don't get to sleep until at least 11pm...are you sugesting I survive on no sleep during the week?...

[Izzy]

...caffeine makes me shake and thus affects my bakery skills as well as my handwriting...plus I have to get up at 4 am and currently don't get to sleep until at least 11pm...are you sugesting I survive on no sleep during the week?...

Caffeine also keeps you awake, and if you begin fidgeting, go for smaller dosages. I, understandably, wasn't aware of your sleeping schedule prior to posting that, so no, I wasn't suggesting to completely deprive yourself of sleep.

Considered leaving the kids at the grandparent's?

[Guest]

...I live in Olympia...my mom lives in Bellevue, my dad in Carnation...at least 1 1/2 hour drive one way...my husband's parents live just down the street but his dad works all day and his mom has OCD and is not comfortable watching Chay by herself...as for our schedule...we [me and Chay] are in school from 7am to 3pm monday through friday...

[Guest]

Don't give up. I know it seems like kind of empty advice, and vague and pointless, but don't give up. I've found that things tend to work themselves out, in the end. Perhaps there is a mom to mom support group for women with young children who are in school? Check with your school's counselor. They may have programs that offer support.

Unfortunately, as a culture, we don't really have the built-in societal support that we once had. "Community" used to mean your neighbors and friends, now it just refers to one of the myriad of faceless online "social" websites that we belong to. As a brand new family man myself, we are quickly discovering just how much the loss of traditional community affects our society.

So my advice: Don't listen to my advice, or anyone else that you chat with around here. Not one of us can reach out and give you help you really need. Talk to the real people who are connected to your specific circumstances and appeal to their, as yet still genetically hardwired, sense of community. Find a group of like-minded people in your area that are going through what you are or already have.

Ironically, this is the single biggest benefit I can think of when discussing organized religion. They got us agnostic/atheist folks beat cold when it comes to providing a helpful community structure. They're not exclusive, but they definitely have the infrastructure.

So good luck, and don't give up. I assure you it will be worth it in the end.

[Guest]

...hopefully things will wok out...but in the meantime I am struggling...at least my teachers are understanding of my situation...

[Guest]

I know i'm not in you're situation but if i were i would take any knowledge i could acquire and use it wisely

oh btw if your mate is with you (hopefully)and your child still young you could have him take shifts as to take the worry off your hands,and at the same time you could be studying or you can be repeated notes in your sleep

[Guest]

Midnight brings up a good point. This may be a touchy issue--don't want to get you into trouble--but is your husband a *real* Dad? By that I mean does he share full time care of Chay 50/50? I assume your hours away from home are similar to his. If so, he has no valid excuse for shirking the hands-on parental duties. He only has one chance to be the best Dad he can be--he's really denying himself the experience and the future reward of raising the best kid he can raise

If he's not doing his share, send him to me I'll tell him a thing or two.

Alternative--My niece lives in Kent and I don't think she's currently employed.