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a general sense of sadness


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I look at our world and the troubles it has as well as the troubles it has over come. I am grateful for the things i have, a relatively free safe environment, clean water good food, plentiful entertainment. but i somehow can't help but feel a general sense of sadness. like too high a price was paid for it. and is being paid for it. I want to change, but I don't know how or even what to. i feel like i can barely answer some of the basic questions let alone the bigger ones. let me give you some small examples. are we better off as a species with technology or without it? yes we live longer on the whole, but community is the goal, not life, and i don't see much increase in the amount of personal interaction between human beings. we live in the big sprawling cities but we interact on the most part though our computers not in person.

i feel mentally drained myself, from trying to grasp how human beings should behave. i find myself at least once a day contemplating suicide simply because i don't know what to do with myself.

i feel like i missed out on the important lessons in life; love, happiness, curiosity, friendship and replaced it with work, money, and security. :-(

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Even now, people are chatting and playing mafia and solving riddles and wasting time on Internet forums when others are literally dying of hunger and disease. But sadness, however illuminating it may be to the state of the world, cannot change the inevitable. I believe that people cannot perfect the world, but we can change it. Make it better. Make it a place where others can feel joy and togetherness and peace. It is never, ever too late to make a positive difference. One person out of 7-8 billion can't usually have a very large effect in the big picture, I know. But what if just one person dedicated their life to promoting community togetherness? What about eliminating world poverty? Illiteracy? Cancer? Cruelty? Racism?

What if ten or a hundred people were that passionate about changing the world?

What if it were millions?

Humans can never make evil go away. But what use is it to let it rule the world? We can surrender, or we can fight.

So, Phil, I think you should find something that you care about. What do you want to change? What makes you the saddest about how Earth works right now? It's okay to check up on Brainden sometimes to read new riddles. But whatever your cause is is what you should dedicate yourself to. Find a true friend. Learn to fly. Donate to charity. Write a book. Stop reading these clichés.

Live life.

Go out there!

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Phil, I hope this passes. Depression is serious - I battled it for twenty years. I was fortunate enough to stay off medication. I feel best when I concentrate on value-creating projects (music) and diversions (BrainDen). Cultivate a few trusted friendships and lean on them when you need to. One person, a soul mate, listened to me, endlessly, over a period of five years. Without that person I would not have made it. Immerse yourself in a couple of things the bring you enjoyment. Let the world take care of itself. Trust the next generation to be strong and wise enough to take on the great projects that will fall to them. The world is a mixed bag. It has its bright spots. You can be one of them.

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