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I'm going to need your help first...

11 posts in this topic

Posted · Report post

Okay. Just to let everyone know, I could do this joke without your help, but it's much funnier when the people starring in the joke are people you know.

So, who wants to volunteer?

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Posted · Report post

"Me?" *raises hand*

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Posted · Report post

Yay! Thank you! Now, One or two more people. Then you are rewarded with your joke.

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Posted · Report post

Uh, all right then.

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Posted · Report post

Okay, if this joke falls short, then my apologies in advance. One more volunteer.

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Posted · Report post

...

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Posted (edited) · Report post

I'm going to take that as a hand! Okay, so onto the joke.

So Kikacat123, Aaryan and DeathStone0000 are all mysteriously murdered at exactly the same moment.

They meet up at the Pearly Gates, and are talking among themselves, when they are greeted by St. Peter.

"Hello guys," he says. "Look, there's been a bit of an accident - some idiot wishing for a million ducks or whatever, and now Heaven has ducks everywhere. Unfortunately, we can't just get rid of them - orders from the big guy upstairs, you know - so you'll just have to avoid stepping on them for now. Apologies, and, well, welcome to Heaven!"

He steps aside, allowing them through the now open gates, and their eyes widen in shock. There are ducks literally everywhere.

"Well, I guess we'll just have to do what he says and avoid them," says DeathStone0000, and his companions agree.

They're trying to get to a nearby McDonald's (they really are everywhere), when Kikacat123 steps on a duck.

St. Peter appears out of nowhere, and says, "I'm sorry, but we can't just let these things slide. There has to be a consequence." He chains Kikacat123 to a hideously ugly man for the rest of her eternity. The man leads her away to a hipster cafe, and she pauses to give a small wave to her friends, before going inside. They wave back, now too scared to even go near a duck.

Months pass before one of the remaining two steps on a duck - this time DeathStone0000. He's chained to a hideously ugly woman for the rest of his eternity, who leads him to a nightclub nearby. DeathStone0000 stand for a moment in the doorway, waving goodbye to Aaryan.

Ten years later, Aaryan - having seen the fates of his friends - still hasn't stepped on a single duck. He's greeted by St. Peter.

"Congratulations," he says, shaking Aaryan's hand, "You haven't steeped on a duck. You deserve a reward."

St. Peter chains him to a beautiful blonde girl for the rest of his eternity.

"Wow," says Aaryan, "I had no idea there would be a reward. You're really very beautiful, and I don't know what I did to deserve a girl like you."

The girl sighs and says sullenly, "I don't know what you did, but I stepped on a duck."

- The End -

Edited by kestrelknight
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Posted (edited) · Report post

Did requiring three volunteers really do anything except hurt my feelings :dry::P?

Edited by Aaryan
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Posted · Report post

Well, I had to choose one person to be 'it'. It;s difficult to take it personally when I've never actually met you, so...

No offense meant. :unsure:;):P:D

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Posted · Report post

Am I supposed to take this as a complement then? :) :)

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Posted · Report post

Am I supposed to take this as a complement then? :) :)

Probably.

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