[mewminator]

sharing the country's wealth of jokes (making jokes is one of the few things we're capable of) about our upper Egyptians:

An upper Egyptian and Einstein were sitting next to each other, bored, so Einstein decided to stir a conversation and eventually lead to this:

Einstein: Tell you what, I'll ask you a question, if you can't answer it you'll give me a dollar, but if i can't answer your question, I'll give you a 100 dollars

Upper Egyptian: Okay

Einstein: How does gravity work?

Upper Egyptian:.....

So he gave Einstein a dollar

Einstein: Your turn

Upper Egyptian: What climbs up a mountain on 4 legs but climbs down on 3 legs?

He was thinking for a long time but in the end he gave the Egyptian a 100 dollars

Einstein: My turn: What climbs up a mountain on 4 legs but climbs down on 3 legs? I want the answer.

Upper Egyptian:.....

And he gave him a dollar

and former (not so) beloved president Hosny Mubarak:

Our president was once on an aeroplane with George W.Bush, one of his assistants and a monkey.

George W.Bush: I'll make you a deal, Mubarak, if you manage to make this monkey laugh, I'll remove 25% of Egypt's debts

Mubarak (to assistant): Make that monkey laugh.

The assistant whispered something to the monkey and the monkey laughed.

Bush: If you make the monkey cry I'll remove 50% of Egypt's debts

Same procedure, Mubarak orders assistant, assistant whispers in the monkey's ears, monkey cries.

Bush: If you make the monkey want to jump out of the plane window, I'll remove all of Egypt's debts.

Blablabla the monkey's banging on the plane window.

Mubarak: How did you manage to make the monkey do all these things

Assistant: Simple, for a laugh I said: That Idiot is ruling Egypt

to make it cry I said: That idiot has been ruling for nearly 30 years

for the attempted suicide i said: That idiot wants his son to rule after him

and other random jokes:

Note: You may get bored reading this joke it's long and is meant to bore and annoy the listener (reader) with pointless listing and repetition, although I am not responsible to what happens to you when (if) you finish reading this joke. READ AT OWN RISK.

A guy was returning from work and thought: Should I take a bus or a cab?

If I take the cab, no problem but if i take the bus then there are 2 situations:

1-I stand

2-I sit down

If I stand there's, no problem but if i sit then there are 2 situations

1-I sit next to a man

2-i sit next to a woman (note that buses are so crowded that the odds of you finding a seat without anyone sitting next to you is near 0)

if I sit next to a man, no problem, but if I sit next to a woman there are 2 situations

1-We talk

2-We don't talk

If we don't talk, no problem, if we do talk then there are 2 situations

1-I fall in love

2-I don't fall in love

If I don't fall in love, no problem, if i do then there are 2 situations

1-We get married

2-We don't get married

If we don't get married, no problem, if we do then there are 2 situations

1-We have kids

2-We don't have kids

if we don't have kids, no problem, if we do then there are 2 situations

1-There will be a boy

2-There won't be a boy

If there will be no boys, no problem, if there will be then there are 2 situations

1-He will like football (soccer not American football, most popular sport in our country)

2-He won't like football

If he doesn't like football, no problem, if he does then there are 2 situations

1-He'll play in the street

2-He will play in other places

If he plays in other places, no problem, if he plays in the street then there are 2 situations

1-He'll get run over

2-He won't get run over

If he doesn't get run over, no problem, if he does then there are 2 situations

1-He dies

2-He doesn't die

If he doesn't die, no problem if he DOES die.... I'd better take a cab

What is your expression if you have successfully finished reading this joke:

It may not be to your liking so I just posted a couple of samples, if you like I could post more, some of it may seem pointless but it's funny in the end, all translated but understandable I suppose.

Edited December 3, 2011 by mewminator

[Thalia]

My response: He thinks too much.

[MissKitten]

My reaction to it all:

[EDM]

[Guest]

@ EDM re-Brainden Rules....they longer then that silly joke of Newminators and nearly as funny

[Guest]

ahahahahahahahahahahaa ahhh niccee post laughed at all!!! i've heard the first one before but slightly diff.. still gets me every time

for the laugh

my expression to the last then

[Guest]

nice one there

[Guest]

me get tired of thinking so much that hurts

[Guest]

[Guest]

my response: